Do Your Best, Then Let Go
Welcome to The Big 3!
Today’s Big 3 is inspired by one of your replies to last week’s edition. The theme? Detachment aka letting sh*t go.
So let’s look at detachment, releasing our wants and getting empowered through surrender.
Enjoy!
The Lesson
Detachment can Lead to Breakthrough
Obsession has always been a driving force for me, holding on to the vision until I see it through. Letting go is not quite my natural inclination. However, the more I do life, the more I realize that letting go is not all that bad.💁🏾♀️
Recently one of my clients experienced a breakthrough after desperately applying to and getting rejected for grants to fund her creative project. After consciously detaching herself from the desired outcome and instead, focusing on new ways to bootstrap her project, the good news came.
When she least expected it, she stumbled upon a positive response to one of her grant applications, the cheque was waiting for her. Classic!
First, you obsess. Then you do the work. Aaaand finally, you let go and move on, not knowing what may happen. And be ok with it.
Because sometimes, after you’ve done everything in your power about a thing, the best you can, and should do is nothing. Rest.
The Book
The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck, by Mark Manson
Chances are you know about this one and probably bought it or even received it as a gift. Either way, I am thrilled to share this counterintuitive approach to living a good life with you.
Warning: this book contains a lot of cursing, especially at the beginning. Proceed with caution.
I bought it two years ago and have only read about it recently. I love Manson's straightforwardness, transparency and vulnerability throughout the entire book. His cursing, however, not so much. But as with everything else in life, take what you need, and discard the rest
Quotes from the book:
On needs: “An obsession and overinvestment in emotion fails us for the simple reason that emotions never last. Whatever makes us happy today will no longer make us happy tomorrow, because our biology always needs something more.”
On choices: “Whether we like it or not, we are always taking an active role in what's occurring to and within us. We are always interpreting the meaning of every moment and every occurrence. We are always choosing the values by which we live and the metrics by which we measure everything that happens to us. Often the same event can be good or bad, depending on the metric we choose to use. The point is, we are always choosing, whether we recognize it or not. Always.”
On uncertainty: “Life is about not knowing and then doing something anyway. All of life is like this. It never changes. Don't ever forget that. And don't ever be afraid of that.”
The Strategy
Surrender your way to glory
In case you needed to hear it, you have laboured long enough. You have toiled and worked on this long enough. Let it go.
It sounds good in writing, but surrendering isn't something I appreciated or practiced before - pardon my then-controlling nature.
However, life has shown me many times over that letting things go is often (not always) the gateway to unexpected and better opportunities.
Letting go of what you had in mind can be empowering and liberating.
So, what is one obsession, all-consuming thought, goal, or plan you need to surrender? Is it stealing your sleep, your joy or eating motivation away?
What if you decided to let it go? Maybe you'll feel lighter, a better plan will come, or you'll get your sleep back, who knows?
You don't always have to know how it will play out. Uncertainty is what life is made of anyway. Take a deep breath and let go.
Thank you for reading.
Until next week,
Stay Consistent.
